The Book of NeoGenesis The Evolution of Mankind From Rocks
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LAUGH 'TILL YOUR SIDES ACHE HAVE THE BEN-GAY READY
DON'T
DARE LEAVE THIS STORE WITHOUT
GETTING THIS BOOK!! IT WILL BE THE BEST MONEY YOU EVER SPENT!!
Attention Darwinist Evolutionists, and Secular Humanists!
The book you've been waiting for is finally here! - This book by WebPastor
David Todeschini, is a tongue-in-cheek spoof on the FANTASY of the Darwinist
Pagan Religion. The first three chapters of the Book of Genesis - re-written
according to what you would have to believe in order to believe in
"evolution".
There is nothing like a good laugh to dispel
the ridiculous and the absurd from one's mind, and this book - which is replete
with Latin words and legal terminology (which are defined in copious footnotes)
will have you in stitches laughing at anyone who could be so
STUPID (That's right, I said
"STUPID") enough as to believe in Darwin's Theory of Evolution. Yes, it is a
BELIEF, just as belief in God is a BELIEF - Only it takes much more FAITH to
believe in Evolution than it does to believe in an all-powerful God who
created the universe from (literally) nothing.
This book is a great gift for evolutionist friends and
acquaintances, but is not for the faint-of-heart.
WARNING
IDIOTS,
CRETINS, IMBECILES, AND ATHEISTS WILL BE OFFENDED BY THIS BOOK
(Tough!)
This book is so hilarious, it's dangerous.
If you suffer
from a weak ticker, you might just die laughing!
The fact that anyone can believe that Man "evolved" from apes is hilarious
in itself, but if one believes that, this book illustrates how one who holds
such a belief ultimately has to conclude that Mankind "evolved" from rocks.
If you believe in the "Big Bang" without Divine intervention, then you
ultimately believe that your ancestors were rocks.
Key
Points in the book
How the "Big Bang" accident happened by chance.
Adam's mother was a gorilla.
Adam's wife was his sister.
What kind of tree was it that God forbade Adam and Eve to eat
from?
Find out why [God] didn't want Adam and Eve to touch that ONE
tree... (I won't spoil it for you).
Was the devil a snake BEFORE Eve took the fruit? - the answer is
right in the Bible.
PREVIEW
{From Chapter Three of
NeoGenesis}
1. As Adam and
Eve ran from the forest, Eve started giggling uncontrollably, collapsing on
the grass, exhausted.
2. And Adam said to her, "What's so
funny? - We just got evicted from the best crib on the planet!" And Eve
responded, "Yo, Adam, that Nada dude was mad funny! He chopped off Sakla's
legs... Like the black knight in the forest in Monty Python's..... {{Toke}}
Samurai Tree-smoker hah, hah, hah!"
3. As Eve was hysterical, Adam stood
there dumbfounded. He never heard of Monty Python, and he narrowly looked
upon her and said, "Eve, what have I
to do with thee?"
4. And she coyly looked away as she
walked into the tall grass, then glancing back, saying,
"Adam, sweetie, {{Toke}} you KNOW
what you have to do with me."
5. And Adam said to her, "Didst thou
save the roach of the blunt thereof?"
6. And Eve replied, "Yes, dear, it's in
my purse along with a key and a large bag of Doritos."
7. And the two of them partook of the
remnant of the tree, and were soon
in flagrante delicto in the field of tall
grass.
8. Soon it came to pass that Eve was
with child, and when her time had come to be delivered, it was a boy, and
they called his name Toke, because he had been conceived under the
influence.
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